On Communication

[alexseanchai]

there are things
I want
to tell
my mother

things I want
to ask her

and I could
if I lied
just a little

say "he"
instead of
the proper pronoun

pretend to
cisgender
heterosexuality

and even with
the parts she most
objects to
stripped out
of what
to tell her
she would object

to the distance
to thinking oneself able
to know someone else
only through what they say
with words

so I stitch closed
my mouth
and with my hands
type a poem
she will never
see.

Comments

[alexseanchai]

The 7%-of-communication-is-with-words bit is apparently a falsehood, but so much of communication is through tone of voice and facial expressions and whatnot—

[nenya_kanadka]

I know this feel. It sucks. :( *hugs*

(For real this is one of the reasons I failed so hard with my first girlfriend--I didn't know who to ask the How To Relationship questions, and my mother, who I would have talked to if it had been a guy, was out of the question for...well...these exact reasons. Meh. I hope things work out better for you. <3)

[alexseanchai]

Hugs, thanks.

[silveradept]

Family. Sometimes such an impediment.

[alexseanchai]

Yes.