I realize we're all taking a single canon line way past its likely intent, but whatever. Fun!

[I don't think this will actually fit in "trust thou my constancy", because the only place in the outline it makes any sense, Chat is epically not in this sort of mood. Neither is Marinette, and he might be willing to fake hella cheer for the audience right now but she is not. But it's funny, so here.]

Chat Noir is reviewing footage of an akuma attack and gets distracted by trying to calculate the impact forces involved.

Alya, probably: "...are you a [Geekbug] contributor?"

Chat Noir, grinning: "Particle physicists do it with charm."

Marinette: "Uh-huh. You're totally a mathematical physicist."

Chat Noir: *groans*

Marinette, delighted: "Oh, you've heard this one!"

Alya, probably: "Say what?"

Chat Noir, in a long-suffering tone: "Mathematical physicists understand the theory of how to do it, but have difficulty obtaining practical results."

Chat Noir, cheerfully, once the laughter dies down: "Eh, it's okay. She'll fall for me someday."

[If I were minded to continue this bit, I would now try to figure out how best to word a Newton's apple slash apple of Chat's eye joke.]

(Chat Noir is absolutely a contributor to the friendly local superhero-physics blog. Hell, it might be primarily Adrien's blog! Under a pseud with no obvious relation to Adrien Agreste, and only a fannish sort of relation to Chat Noir if any, because this is probably unbefitting of Gabriel Agreste's son and, more importantly, he doesn't want to find out the hard way how much inward force as applied by Ladybug's yoyo cord it takes to break Chat Noir's neck. The most annoying bit of this is he can't run experiments on his own capacities with intent to post the results; his posts can only analyze publicly accessible footage.)

(no subject)

Bodies suck. Whose idea was this? I want a word.